Liu: Sleep in Heavenly Peace

My heart is hurting. About a half an hour ago we got a call that we lost a little girl. Her name was Liu; she was four months old and had just had heart surgery a couple of days ago. She wasn't supposed to make it through the nearly 9 hour surgery, but she did- a testimony in and of itself. Her condition was the second most serious they've had. She will not know pain again and though she was neglected by her father here, she will now never leave the arms of our Father in heaven. She has been in the hospital the whole time I've been here so I have only seen her picture. This place in which I am blessed to work takes such excellent care of all the children and the four children they have now lost have been, I believe, because of such complications.

I didn't even know this little girl but I wonder if this pain as a result of her death is similar at all to the pain that her parents (and the parents of all these children) felt when they chose to let them go. It has to be a death in and of itself because the life that a child brings is the greatest gift of new life that God has given and continues to give. See how He brought our Savior into the world? These parents will probably never know what has happened to their children...did they overcome their health problems? were they able to recover from malnutrition? will they grow up to be strong, smart, and beautiful beyond measure? will they change the world? I know they will. I wish that Savannah's parents could see how witty, thoughtful and intelligent she is. I wish that William's family could too know the joy his big eyes and smiling face bring everyday to the people around him. I wish Emily's mom and dad could hear her laugh. I know too that Liu will not be forgotten.

I need to mention too with much happiness and thanksgiving that on Friday both Ben and Peter were back and feeling much, much better! Peter was even energetic enough to scratch a small chunk of skin off of my face :) I'll take that any day from any of them to have them here.

So tonight, may she find rest that she has never known before.

My Day with Peter

It was a little after 8:30 yesterday morning, I was holding a little girl named Addison as the babies were waking up. The preschool director came into the room and told us that one of us needed to go with Peter and Ben (two of the preschool boys) to the hospital. We decided that I would go. Ben has been throwing up consistently for the past three days and had been in the hospital the day before. There aren't any adequate medical facilities of any sort in the village, so if a child has a fever or the doctor isn't sure what is going on, they have to drive into the city to one of the hospitals. As we were driving (the doctor, one of the nannies, the driver and the two boys) I was preparing myself for the worst. My roommate, Anne (from Quebec) had been there with Ben the day before and said that the conditions were terrible. I held Peter who was burning up in my arms all the way there- the poor little guy still managed to smile even though he was obviously feeling horribly. I was thankful when he eventually fell asleep.
We arrived at the hospital and it was chaos. Even more so because I don't understand the majority of what is being said. I followed the two women inside through to the pediatric ward. This place would never pass by American health standards. Ben was whisked away upstairs and I was left with Peter in the "Pediatric Rescue Room." Families would come in and out of this small room with their children. IV's were all over the place, children were getting shots; nothing was sanitized, the bed sheets were never changed between patients and their were various bodily fluids all over. Peter was so uncomfortable as we kept being moved around, pushed into a corner, as we waited for him to be seen. I tried everything to keep him content and calm and I was so upset that nothing was making a difference. All I could do was pray. There wasn't a diaper around so he was wet the whole time we were gone. Another little girl in the room with us at one point apparently had to use the bathroom so her dad just held the trash can in the room under her- this is normal behavior here.
Finally, Peter had a blood test and they decided to give him and IV which was put in through his head ( I didn't know that you could do it that way) and he was miserable. After that finished, I was sent back to the orphanage alone with Peter and all of Ben's wet clothes (from throwing up so much). Ben had to stay behind and was transferred to the Children's hospital later that day. I was so glad when we got back in the afternoon and at the end of the day Peter was looking better. Sadly though he had to go back today with another intern, Lindsey and I haven't heard anything yet.
The fever is spreading among the children and a number of others have had to go to the hospital. My only comfort through this whole experience is that God is with these precious little ones in their suffering. He understands their discomfort and pain because He chose to bear our infirmities. His love is what holds them when there is no one else who cares.
I have a feeling this won't have been my last visit to the hospital while I'm here and I hope that this wave of sickness will quickly pass.

On the Ground

So, I made it safely here early on Thursday afternoon, tweleve hours ahead of "home time." Already it feels like I've been here longer than three days. It is wonderful- its a different world, but I know this is where I'm supposed to be. The first day was a bit of a fog as I slept very little on the plane. The people who work at the foster home, the interns and the teachers at the English school have been so welcoming and helpful. I met a number of the children right away- they are beautiful and their unique personalities jumped out right away. I'll talk more specifically about them later on.

On Thurday evenings, they have Fellowship and this was an awesome way to start my time here "being one in spirit and in purpose." The apartment I'm staying in with six other girls is on the sixth floor of a complex that is considered to be the "penthouse" of the area. We walk almost a mile from the orphanage to get to it. This village is made up of nearly 50,000 people and it is, already, one of my favorite things to walk through the market to buy fresh produce and chicken on a stick; to see the children running around and the people squatting together in their doorways near the street. Everyone lives very simply and most people don't have running water. Today a few of us were walking and this little toddler pointed her finger at us and started laughing hysterically- it was great- we are rather strange looking to one who hasn't seen a foreigner before.

There is so much I want to talk about but I don't have a whole lot of time. On Friday, I had orientation and became familiar with what I'll be doing with the children. It is an amazing stroy of how God began this work here. In some ways, I have been questioning whether I'm more of a burden because of how they go out of their ways to get me settled and show me how everything works. The language barrier is frustrating especially when trying to communicate with the nannies of the children or trying to explain something to one of the kids. At least I know how to say "I love you" :) I'll be taking language classes with some of the other interns three times a week, so I'm hoping that will make a difference; I'm grateful for the small amount I was able to learn before I came!

I'm praying to find each day the purpose the Lord has for me, and He is teaching me to loosen my expectations and be obedient with whatever He places before me. I know God is doing a powerful work in this country and it is an honor to be in the midst of it. When the plane touched down the words that Moses heard came to my mind "the place where you are standing is holy ground." God is here.

Here is a little about the kids I've been with so far:

Peter- is quite a character, he has the most intense crawl I'v ever seen. He is very playful and has a great smile and he loves to bite. His complications have delayed him slightly developmentally but he seems healthy otherwise.

Gabriel- was the first child I got to hold :) He is probably the most serious case medically here- he only has one ventricle on top of other heart problems- his body is very weak and his fingers and toes are blue- ish beacuse of lack of circulation. He is a wiggle worm and likes just laying on your lap or being swooped into the air.

Joseph- was having a serious temper tantrum the first time I met him. He knows how to push buttons but at least he smile when he does it. Caterpillars make him very uncomfortable.

Savannah- is a marvelous hair dresser; I am very proud to say that she did mine. She is very intelligent and knows more English than she lets on. She seems to be a mother to a lot of the babies- she'll just come up at squeeze them in a hug very hard and smother them with a huge kiss!

William- is in a rolling stage. That is mostly what he does- rolls ar sleeps, what a life!

Olivia- is a sweet girl who knows exactly what she wants. I get to teach her (or attempt to) English for a half hour every day. She wasn't too happy with me on Friday but I pray she'll warm up to me.

Emily- is just a sweethart. She just came up and hugged me when I first saw her and will do that to just about anyone.

Christopher- is very hard to get to smile in any way or form- he is getting better though and is a very good baby!

All the kids love having attention and love to laugh! And if one starts to cry, things very easily escalate thats for sure.

Hats, Hats...and More Hats

About four months ago, my roommates, Iris, Em, Beth and I started knitting hats for the orphanage I'll be working at. My hope was to be able to provide a hat for each of the 37 children, but little did I know how God was going to multiply this. As I leave in less than two days :), I'll be bringing with me the following:

Handmade Items-
- 133 knitted/crocheted kids hats of all sizes
- 1 pair of baby slippers
- 6 baby blankets
- 21 child-sized afghan blankets
- 1 scarf
- 1 bib

Other Items-
- 1 porcelin doll
- 6 packages of baby wipes
- 2 containers of wet wipes
- 2 containers of baby formula
- 2 packages of construction paper
- 2 Bible story coloring books
- 2 containers of fluoride mouthwash
- 2 containers of oatmeal lotion

Wow. Praise God! And if that isn't enough, He also allowed for $1500 to be raised for the specific needs of the home and children there! Hopefully I'll be able to fit in with the luggage! I am overwhelmed with joy and gratitude: to all of you for your eagerness to pray and give so generously and to the Lord, in His goodness, for doing over and above what I imagined!

May He continue to do so and continue to make this trip so much bigger than just me going. To Him be all the glory!

Off of the Sidewalk

There is just something about the morning...the sun that peeks its way over the horizon, the fresh smells brought in by the breeze, and the quietness that lingers briefly as everyone is just beginning to wake up. Though a number of my friends would disagree, I am convinced that this is the best time of the day :) I feel like God can teach us so much in moments like this when our hearts are still and before we allow the busy-ness of our days to take over. Furthermore, it amazes me how He can use the simplest things in our lives to reveal to us eternal truths.
This morning, I was walking my dog along our usual trek, doing my best to dodge the thistle bushes that have taken over the sidewalk. I realized that I was randomly pulling off the heads of the tall wheat that would brush against my legs, collecting it in my hand until it was full and then throwing it on the ground. Looking across the area, the wheat is everywhere, scattered among various weeds and thorny plants, but growing nonetheless.
Normally, I wouldn't think twice about this, but for some reason, today, something hit me. So much of my life is lived on the sidewalk. It is so easy for me to go about my daily routine sharing the Good News only when people "brush up against me" or I happen to just run into them. Jesus told us that the harvest fields are ready- if only there would be harvesters to go into them. He calls us to get off of the path that the world treads along and live radically different lives. To be His disciple means to forge into the fields tangled with weeds of hardship, discomfort and even persecution to seek out the precious souls who are awaiting "the sons of God to be revealed" (Rom 8:19). If the King of the Universe was willing to dive into the dirt amidst our brokenness in order to pull us out- how much more are we bound to the responsibility of bearing fruit in doing the same.
A friend serving with his family in SE Asia recently wrote these words of Charles Spurgeon in their blog: "Someone asked: will the heathen be saved? It is more a question with me whether we- who have the Gospel and fail to give it to those who have not- can be saved."
This cuts deep in me because, more than anything, I want to live off of the sidewalk. A life where faith is more than enough, in the middle of the harvest field where Jesus is. Thank you, Father, for not allowing me to be content with anything less than Your fullness. Echoing the words of Jim Elliot, my prayer is this:
"Oh that God would make us dangerous..."

A Taste Before Leaving

For the past month, I have been working part time at an Asian restaurant. I really wanted to do this in order to become more familiar with the language (submersion in a sense), its culture and to continue to understand the best way to relate to the people in general. It has been a unique and unforgettable experience so far.
The chef and kitchen staff speak very minimal English, but, thankfully, my boss, Anna, her husband, and the spectacular "sushi woman" (as I like to call her), Mindy, do speak a fair amount of English.
It is very interesting the different ideas we have about Asian restaurants and the people who work in them. I approached a table one evening and the husband and wife were debating whether or not I was Chinese- I hope (but seriously doubt) that this might happen when I am actually there...becoming "all things to all people", as Paul said. Here are some of the crucial lessons I have learned from working at this great place:
1.) While it is true that a smile is one of the best ways to communicate when there is a language barrier, it apparently has the potential to invoke offers of marriage.
2.) A Japanese pickle is not the same thing as an American pickle.
3.) I am not a natural when it comes to using chopsticks; this is especially awkward when I'm attempting to use them while all of my Chinese friends are looking on as they successfully use American silverware.
4.) The majority of Asian people are very hard workers, tirelessly pouring into their livelihood even when it means making huge sacrifices.
5.) Octopus is very chewy, cooked pumpkin is delicious, and rice is its own foodgroup.
6.) Asian children melt my heart.
7.)I will always appreciate waitors and waitresses knowing, now, how challenging the job can be.
8.) Life is empty and lonely and all work meaningless without Jesus.

...the least of these....

"Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after widows and orphans in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world." James 1:27

If you have a heart for the suffering children around the world this is a great resource and tool. There are so many kids with so many needs and we each can uniquely offer them so much!

http://www.voiceoftheorphan.org